Ava Gardner: Great Sluts of History

“If I had my life to live over again, I’d live it the same way. Maybe a few changes here or there, but nothing special. The truth is, honey, I’ve enjoyed my life. I’ve had a hell of a good time.”

I don’t know what they carved on her tombstone, but Ava Lavinia Gardner did indeed have a hell of a good time in her life.

Born on December 24, 1922 (she later made pointed remarks about that Jesus Christ person trying to steal her birthday), the youngest of seven children to poor cotton and tobacco farmers, her ancestry included Scots-Irish, English, Irish, French Huguenot, and Native American (Tuscarora).

“She can’t sing, she can’t act, she can’t talk, she’s terrific. Sign her!”

Ava Gardner (Photo credit: Lexinatrix)After a New York talent scout wanna-be spotted her picture in the window of her bro-in-law’s photography studio and dropped some hints, said bro-in-law and sister sent the 18 year old over the MGM’s New York talent office for a screen test.

Al Altman didn’t even bother to record her speaking, since her North Carolina accent was so thick he could barely understand her. But when Louis B. Mayer saw her screen test, he sent a telegram with the above quote, signing her to a standard MGM contract. And provided a speech coach.

“In one scene, when I was supposed to say, “In a pig’s eye you are,” what came out was, “In a pig’s ass you are.” Old habits die awfully hard.” ― Ava…